FALLING IN LOVE What love is:
■Supportive - does your boyfriend or girlfriend encourage you? Attend your baseball game, even though they couldn't be less interested in sports? Do they show up for the play you have a part in even though you're on stage for less than a minute (and you're dressed as a horse)? A love relationship means supporting your partner's interests - even when they don't coincide with your own.
■Unconditional - nobody likes being criticized. But when it's your significant other doing the smack-talking it's much more hurtful...a boyfriend or girlfriend who spends more time belittling you than sweet-talking you is not worth your love.
■Generous - when you're coupled up, suddenly the emphasis is more on the us than on the me. That's not to say that suddenly your feelings go out the window...instead, part of being in a healthy relationship is balancing what you need with what someone else needs. Sometimes it's tough to do, but real love involves generosity of your time.
What love isn't:
■Controlling - this kind of love doesn’t let you be you. Instead, your partner calls the shots and tells you what to do, when, and for how long. Instead of an equal footing, your partner dominates the relationship and always decides what is “best for us".
■Conditional - love that is based on meeting a standard of performance; you have to do something or be something in order to earn the love. So don't dare gain a few pounds, make friends with the wrong crowd, or suddenly stop doing well in your sport.
■Based on lust - this is love based on excitement. Instead of understanding your partner from the inside out - falling for them based on who they are, this kind of love only sees the physical aspects of a relationship.
No comments:
Post a Comment